The Road to Tender Hearts by Annie Hartnett *****

The Road to Tender Hearts by Annie Hartnett

PJ wants to marry his high school sweetheart, whom he hasn’t seen in forty-five years. Ten-year-old Luna wants to find her biological father, a soap opera star.  Pancakes, the orange cat, who can read and sense impending death, is along for the ride. Don’t miss this one.

PJ is an alcoholic, but when Fred invites him to be the best man at his wedding to PJ’s ex-wife, Ivy, PJ decides to become sober. When Fred and Ivy leave for a vacation to Alaska, PJ feels abandoned. Fortunately, PJ learns that his high school sweetheart, Michelle Cobb, has been widowed. He decides to drive from Massachusetts to Arizona to marry “the one who got away.” Also, when the grandchildren of PJ’s estranged brother, Chip, become orphans, the Massachusetts Department of Children and Families gives PJ guardianship of Ollie and Luna, nine- and ten-year-old Irish twins. This is a comedy. Enjoy it.

This is how author Annie Hartnett explains the book: “And I decided I would make that novel as funny as I possibly could. That was my challenge to myself: to put everything bad I could think of in there and make it my funniest book yet. Humor is how I have always coped with anxiety and fear and terror and discomfort, so I wanted to make it all terrible but also very funny. Things are so horrendously bad, let’s laugh about it!”

Ollie and Luna are happy to live with PJ instead of going into foster care. He won $1.5 million in the lottery. He bought them a trampoline and iPads. However, what Luna wants is to confront the soap opera star Mark Stackpole. Her research through her mother’s papers has convinced her that her mother was in a ménage à trois that included Mark, and that Mark is her true father. She convinces PJ to help her find Mark.

PJ had two daughters. Kate, his older daughter, died after Prom, drunk, drowned in two inches of water. Sophie, seven years younger, has lost her job. She also feels abandoned by her mother, Ivy, and fiancé Fred.

PJ, Sophie, Ollie, Luna, and Pancakes steal Fred’s Volvo for a road trip to find Mark Stackpole and Michelle Cobb. During the trip, PJ discovers he is down to his last $20,000.

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Banana by Dan Koeppel *****

Banana by Dan Koeppel

What do you know? Banana companies are evil. Bananas are popular. Learn more… They are hard to grow and harder to breed. They are sterile. Bananas are a staple food in Africa. The yellow ones in the store are Cavendish. All clones. All at risk. Learn more.

Once all the yellow (dessert) bananas were Gros Michel (Big Mike). They were delicious. They were easy to ship. They were perfect. However, they were vulnerable to Panama Disease. So they were over by Cavendish. Cavendish was second best, but it was resistant to Panama disease. However, Cavendish is now vulnerable to an evolved Panama disease and other banana threats. After 50-plus years of research, there is no replacement for Cavendish.

Good news, bad news. Bananas are seedless. Bananas are sterile. They cannot be cross-bred like other plants. People do not want GMO bananas. After 50-plus years of research, there is no replacement for Cavendish.

Cooking bananas (plantains) are a staple in Africa. They stand between many people and starvation. These bananas are threatened by the same pests that threaten dessert bananas. However, while people in the first world might have to do without sliced bananas for breakfast, in Africa, people are starving.

The Wallace Line is a boundary where flora and fauna have been separated by plate tectonics for long periods of time. This line not only divides plants and animals, but also fungi and bacteria. When bananas are bred to resist microorganisms on one side of a Wallace line, they may fall to a similar organism on the other side. This is one more complication in finding a resistant banana in the global banana environment, where organic matter travels over the international trade routes.

Caveat: While the book covers the science of bananas, much more is spent on the injustices the banana companies of the north brought to the topics, including unstable governments, poor working conditions (cancer, sterility, etc.), and land theft.

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And Then There Were None by Agatha Christie *****

And Then There WereNone by Agatha Christie

One of Agatha Christie’s most famous novels, not Poirot, not Marple, just a unique plot. Ten people were trapped on Soldier Island and murdered according to a nursery rhyme, with no murderer in sight. Classic. Other unique plots by Christie include: "Murder on the Orient Express” and “The Murder of Roger Ackroyd.”

The nursery rhyme:

Ten little soldier boys went out to dine; One choked his little self and then there were Nine.

Nine little soldier boys sat up very late; One overslept himself and then there were Eight.

Eight little soldier boys travelling in Devon; One said he’d stay there and then there were Seven.

Seven little soldier boys chopping up sticks; One chopped himself in halves and then there were Six.

Six little soldier boys playing with a hive; A bumble bee stung one and then there were Five.

Five little soldier boys going in for law; One got in Chancery and then there were Four.

Four little soldier boys going out to sea; A red herring swallowed one and then there were Three.

Three little soldier boys walking in the Zoo; A big bear hugged one and then there were Two.

Two little soldier boys sitting in the sun; One got frizzled up and then there was One.

One little soldier boy left all alone; He went and hanged himself And then there were None.

Frank Green, 1869

 

The main characters are ten individuals who are lured to a secluded island and then murdered one by one. They include:

Justice Wargrave: A retired judge, known for his logical mind and harsh sentences.

Vera Claythorne: A young woman who is a secretary and was a governess.

Philip Lombard: A former soldier with a shady past, and his adventurous and amoral nature.

Emily Brent: Elderly, religious woman with a judgmental attitude towards others.

General Macarthur: A retired army general, haunted by a past mistake.

Dr. Armstrong: A successful doctor who has lost his confidence after a past incident.

Tony Marston: A wealthy young man, known for his recklessness and love of fast cars.

William Blore: A former police inspector, now working as a private investigator.

Thomas Rogers: The butler, who is married to Ethel.

Ethel Rogers: The housekeeper, who is married to Thomas.

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Suddenly a Murder by Lauren Muñoz *****

Suddenly a Murder by Lauren Muñoz

Isadora Morales attends Marian, a school for the super-rich. Her mom is a teacher, and her sister is wheelchair-bound. Seven friends attend a 1920s graduation party. She sneaks into Blaine’s room with a knife. In the morning, he is found stabbed to death.

Six rich friends and Izzy Morales have a 1920s high school graduation party at Ashwood Manor on Sparrow Island. The party goes well until Blaine Gilbert is found dead, stabbed multiple times. Detective Cates and consultant Pilar de Leon investigate. During the investigation, everyone is isolated on the island. (Compare this to Soldier Island in Agatha Christie’s And Then There Were None.) Five stars.

Izzy works at Pegasus Books and shares responsibility for caring for her disabled, younger sister Caye, with her mom. She has a scholarship to Brown University and a secret with Blaine. Blaine is her best friend Kassidy’s boyfriend, when they are not fighting. Blaine had sex with Chloe and gave her an STD. No one likes Blaine, but he is the theater star and the school’s drug dealer, Ritalin and Adderall.

The book finishes with several good plot twists. A subtle message of this book is that none of the super-rich kids have enough money to rescue them from their problems, but that poor Hispanic Izzy has a family that can save her. Don’t miss this one.

Isadora Izzy Morales: The protagonist and narrator, who brings a knife to the island.

Kassidy Logan: The friend who organizes the getaway, Blaine's girlfriend, and Izzy's best friend.

Blaine Gilbert: Kassidy's boyfriend, who is found dead, and a central figure in the mystery.

Fergus Gus Barnes: Blaine's gay best friend and a theater nerd.

Ellison Stephens: Black. Bi-sexual. New to the group, an elite athlete, with hidden secrets.

Chloe Li: A Chinese American valedictorian and lacrosse player, who had feelings for Blaine.

Marlowe West: A Greek American literary gazillionaire and Izzy's crush.

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Gallant: A Gothic Fantasy Novel by V. E. Schwab ****

Gallant: A Gothic Fantasy Novel of UnsettlingSecrets, Unlikely Allegiances, and Demons Behind Closed Doors by V. E. Schwab

Olivia + Hannah = Ohana – Family. How much will Olivia do to escape the orphanage and rescue her family’s home from ghouls, curses, and Death? Mute Olivia, with only her mother’s journal, struggles to unravel her past and find her future. Fantasy.

Before she died, Olivia Prior’s mother abandoned her at Merilance School for Independent Girls with only her mother’s journal. Matron Sarah taught mute Olivia how to sign, but all the other matrons and girls bullied and abused Olivia. None of them learned to sign. Olivia was strong and fought back.

Her mother’s journal warned her, “Olivia, Olivia, Olivia, Remember this— … you will be safe as long as you stay away from Gallant.” However, when Olivia had an opportunity to leave Merilance for Gallant, she took it.

At Gallant, she met Hannah, Edgar, and her cousin Matthew. Also, many dead relatives (ghouls), a secret door to Death’s domain, and family secrets.

The letter that released Olivia from Merilance said, “Come home,” while her mother’s journal warned, “Stay away.”

This is a fantasy about the importance of family and home. “Home is a choice. Those four words sit alone on a page in her mother’s book, surrounded by so much white space they feel like a riddle. In truth, everything her mother wrote feels like a riddle, waiting to be solved.”

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Silence in the Library: A Lily Adler Mystery #2/5 by Katharine Schellman ****

Silence in the Library by Katharine Schellman

In Victorian England, a woman went from the care of her father to that of her husband. As a widow, Mrs. Lily Adler was free of her father and her departed husband. She had more agency than most 27-year-olds. She used that agency to become a private investigator. Her card read, “A Lady of Quality. Discreet Inquiries, Confidential Investigations & Mysteries Solved.” When a Bow Street Runner (precursor to Scotland Yard) investigated the murder of her father’s friend, Sir Charles Wyatt, Lily joined the investigation over many male objections, including her father’s.

The suspects were Sir Charles Wyatt’s family. His son Frank, who loved his father and claimed he would never have hurt him. His nephew Persey, who had gambling debts and was caught stealing from Sir Charles. His autistic son, George, was unpredictable. And finally, his young wife Lady Winifred Wyatt, who refused to share a bed with her husband, but was too small to move him into the position he was discovered.

The case became more complicated when someone murdered Ellen, a housemaid. Also, Maud was discovered, just a few days old, but also a child of the murdered Sir Charles Wyatt.

The book was true to the Victorian time period, and the investigation used clues such as how a maid would clean the house, and how people addressed each other in polite society.

A subplot involved the relationship between Lily and her unexpected and unwelcome house guest, her father, Mr. George Pierce. Her father did not approve of his daughter keeping her own house or investigating murders. Fortunately, Lily was capable of taking care of herself, whether by subterfuge or force. A feminist historical mystery.

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Whiskey Beach by Nora Roberts ****

Whiskey Beach by Nora Roberts

Eli Landon discovered his wife, Lindsay, dead. Divorce proceedings. Husband. Eleven months later, he was still Detective Wolfe’s prime suspect. Break-ins at Bluff House raised the question of Esmeralda’s Dowry, a priceless pirate treasure. Old money and new crimes.

After being hounded by Detective Wolfe for almost a year, Eli left his law firm and Boston for Bluff House and the small-town peacefulness of Whiskey Beach, where his family had lived since the 18^th century. However, someone broke into Bluff House, attacked Eli’s friend, Abra Walsh, and excavated a trench in the basement. Was the intruder looking for Esmeralda’s Dowry? After PI Duncan was shot and tossed over the cliff onto Whiskey Beach, Detective Wolfe returned to accuse Eli of a second murder.

Eli Landon’s family has owned Landon Whiskey and the Bluff House in Whiskey Beach for centuries. When rum was in short supply during the Revolutionary War, they sold whiskey to General Washington. They built the first school, the first indoor plumbing, and the first home with electricity. “They’d weathered Prohibition, cagily running whiskey, supplying speakeasies and private customers.”

In addition to the two murders, the intruder pushed Eli’s grandmother down the stairs and left her for dead. Eli's number one suspect is Justin Suskind. He was having an affair with Eli’s wife. Eli’s wife, Lindsay, was good friends with Justin’s wife, Eden. The only problem is that Eden provides an alibi for Justin, and she maintained her alibi even after she found out that Justin was cheating on her.

The book is a fast read with many extra words that were easily skimmed over. On the other hand, it was over 750 pages and with few plot surprises.

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